Best bet: American Idol: What a weird year it has been for our favorite amateur talent contest: Mean-spirited audition sessions. Simon and Ryan's incessant bickering. Antonella's raunchy photos. Haley's lanky legs. Sanjaya's hair... But now we can put all of that behind us as television's biggest show celebrates its biggest nights. First comes Tuesday's showdown between Blake Lewis and Jordin Sparks, and then, after America jams the phone lines, the winner will be announced the following evening in a glitzy two-hour finale on the floor of Hollywood's Kodak Theatre. Oh, we're breaking out in goose bumps already. 8 p.m. Tuesday and Wednesday, Fox.
Tonight: It's a big year for The Simpsons. Not only does the first family of Springfield have a big-screen movie set for summer, but they're also celebrating their milestone 400th episode tonight as part of a one-hour season finale. The plot line has Kent Brockman pulling a Don Imus and getting into trouble for uttering a shocking remark over the air. 8 and 8:30 p.m., Fox.
Remember when we all cared about what was happening on Desperate Housewives? Now, not so much. Still, tonight's season finale holds some allure as it features two weddings and an extramarital affair. Just par for the course on Wisteria Lane. 9 p.m., ABC.
We're still mourning the grisly death of Christopher on The Sopranos, but as the end nears, we're braced for even more body bags. In tonight's episode, Phil refuses Tony's offer of a compromise, and that can't be a good thing. 9 p.m., HBO.
Monday: Another long, grueling day comes to a close for super-agent Jack Bauer on the season finale of 24. He could use lots of rest -- and so could the show's writers, who displayed signs of creative exhaustion with this year's muddled story line. 8 p.m., Fox.
It could be an explosive night for Heroes as the buzz-laden series wraps up its first season. With Isaac's horrible predictions unfolding before their very eyes, our valiant do-gooders frantically race to keep New York from going ka-boom. 9 p.m., NBC.
Tuesday: It's time to kick up your heels because Dancing With the Stars finally gets around to honoring its top happy-hoofers. Of course, we'll have to endure a bloated two-hour final episode before they hand out that ugly disco ball trophy. 8 p.m., ABC.
Making little clips for YouTube is cute and all, but wouldn't you rather be doing your thing in Hollywood? The new reality series On the Lot gives wannabe filmmakers that chance via a grueling competition. Steven Spielberg and Mark Burnett (Survivor) are executive producers of the show, which awards its winner with a $1 million development deal. 9 p.m., Fox.
Wednesday: Savor tonight's season finale of Lost because we won't have a fresh episode to dissect until February. The spine-tingling suspense series took some critical lumps early this season but has rallied in riveting fashion, and major surprises are reportedly in store. 9 p.m., ABC.
Thursday: Brace yourself for a mammoth onslaught of reality series this summer. Taking the floor tonight is the Season 3 opener of So You Think You Can Dance. It kicks off with audition sessions in New York. 8 p.m., Fox.
Friday: We're still not quite sure what to think of National Bingo Night, but as long as there's money on the line, we're game. Tonight, three in-studio contestants play for a trip around the world. 9 p.m., ABC.
Saturday: If you're looking for a bit of the ol' razzle-dazzle, check out the Oscar-winning Chicago (2002). Renee Zellweger sings, Catherine Zeta-Jones dances and Richard Genre tap-dances -- and somehow it all works. 8 p.m., NBC.
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